Their Beauty Fades with Time
I see looking back at events as memories helps me to analyze my actions and interactions with others so that I can adjust my future behavior as I certainly do NOT want to be the reason someone is sad.
I see looking back and dwelling on the past, whether fond memories or not, as a precursor to miss-remembering, modification and an adulteration of that memory which can, and all too often does lead to anxieties, hurt and pain. Our access of that memory causes a modification of the original memory. Everything we have experienced in life from that original point to the point of recollection has the opportunity to cause a modification. That memory now will never be the same as the brain has a hard time separating the original from the modification.
Our past should serve as a guide to a better future, not a catalyst to pain and failure. Don’t let a ‘memory’ become a grudge.
“Every time we bring back an old memory, we run the risk of changing it.”
“. . . whenever a specific memory is activated, the pathways that caused the activation change their associations to reflect that new activity.”
What Is Memory and How Does It Work?
I recently lost my Dad. No, I didn’t misplace him as I occasionally do my keys or phone, he changed his energy form and left this world as we know it. I say ‘lost’ because at times that’s exactly how I feel, lost. I had always respected my Dad and loved him in a way that honored my respect and connected to the child within that he hid only to be let out every so often. He was an enigma at times that only my Mother fully understood. He was manipulative in ways that encouraged personal growth and he never hovered about with humiliation. He was steady, calm and trustworthy. He set the standard that I compare other people too. Unfortunately, most people all too often simply fall short.
My Dad had been a strong presence in my life since day one. His support came in many ways with that last being his ability to fully understand my job and offer fatherly support in a way that helped me understand and want to do better.
I now must make the adjustment to continue on in the manner he had taught me, with grace and dignity, knowing in my heart and my head what he would reply if I were to ask. I must look for the memories to remind me of his guidance and know that I may feel alone but I do not have to feel lost.
I am reminded every winter of contrasts in life.
I’m thankful I can visit my dad more often now, especially since he is so ill. However, I am still greeted by memories of my youth that all include my mother.
My Take-Away-Treasure from this: It’s the little things we do which have the biggest impact and the longest lasting memories. You matter everything you do matters. Live your life with purpose and meaning. Look for and find the good no matter how hard it may seem at times. Love your life and it will love you back.
Book three is in the works. No completion date at this time, but hopefully ‘soon-ish’.
I support BRaT , Basenji Rescue and Transport, as I believe in what they’re doing. We have adopted through them and fostered for them. I use Smile on Amazon.com to automatically donate to BRaT every time I make a purchase.
However, as I was looking something up I came across another sweet face whose eyes spoke to me – Tickles on Ruff Start Rescue site.
Please consider visiting either, or both websites and donating if you feel like it is something for you to do. I can’t take in every dog who touches my heart but I can help ensure they get their next meal. You can sponsor specific animals on Ruff Start’s site.
Thanks for reading
Within me is energy, life producing energy.
My energy emanates from deep within to venture forth on a journey of multiple destinations.
My energy will course through my body providing will and ability to my organs as it touches every molecule that makes me live.
My energy fills me with purpose as it envelopes my essence with comfort and love.
My energy propels my thoughts, wants, guides my desires and colors my observations with beauty.
My energy is who I am as I live my life as a continual lesson until I return to my source of being and reunite with my Maker.
Copyright mikki roderick 2017
“What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.” Ralph Waldo Emerson
Photo: Image of Energy
RWE Quote from Be Inspired Journal
Ralph Smart – Infinite Waters Video
While watching this video a few things came to mind:
- O.M.Goodness! I see some of my actions in the descriptions!!!! Shameful Behaviours! I MUST work harder and work to change those behaviours as I certainly do NOT want to be treating other people that way, especially my loved ones!
- My hunny works with someone whose behaviour and actions are MANY of those described. I hope my hunny can find some peace, helpful suggestions and develop useful tools for dealing with that person.
- There is a person in my life who seems to find it necessary to always share some sort of criticism about me with me. Its pretty much guaranteed that she will point something out that I do or have done wrong. I have not yet come up with a way to respectfully retort her criticisms so I ignore them at the time and fume over my lack of self-protection later. I truly hope I do not create opportunities like those for other people to feel as bad as I do after being around her. Criticism can be very painful even in situations when it’s been requested. Just because you think it doesn’t mean you should say it.
- Most Important lessons heard for me today-
At 03:25 minutes – “that nobody can make you feel unpleasant without your permission”
At 05:52 minutes – “now realize this, don’t treat people as bad as they are, treat people as good as you are”
I’m better today than I was yesterday though I’m not where I desire to be. I’m thankful I have yet another day on this journey to strive to reach my goals, and then make additional goals. I strive to be stronger and not allow other people’s negativity to affect me, nor for me to replicate it as that is how I used to be. I am thankful there are other people out there who find the desire to share their experiences and helpful suggestions. This has helped to make life enjoyable and given me encouragement to keep trying.
Ain’t Life Grand!
Footnote: Ralph Smart is a Psychologist. Life Coach. Author. Counselor. Criminologist. Alchemist. Educator. Researcher. VFX Artist. Cinematographer. & Infinite Being.
Don’t Judge a Book by it’s Cover – Jadyn Rylee
Watching this video took me back several years, twice. First to the time when my sweet loving daughter was being bullied by several neighborhood girls on the school bus, and then back to when I was in the first grade and was being bullied on the school bus.
My immediate thoughts went to the time when my daughter would get off the bus crying every day. The girls made fun of the color and type of clothes she wore, her hair, her face, and anything else that was different from them and would be hurtful. I was working full-time so picking her up from school everyday wasn’t possible and, from a former bullied person’s perspective, not the best choice. Her father and I tried to help her understand why those girls were picking on her but at that age she couldn’t understand how insecure, emotionally neglected/immature and bullied themselves people thought and acted and that most likely they were striking out because of their own deficiencies. The pain was very real and extremely raw. We then contacted the parents, well, tried to. We called their homes and left messages on their answering machines, more than once. None of the parents returned our calls. We then filed Bullying charges with the elementary school since it was occurring on the school bus. This got action. Only one of the girl’s parents contacted us to find out what was happening. They even came to our house to talk to us about the situation. They seemed genuinely disturbed that their daughter was a part of the bullying actions and actively parented her. A good example how our need to ‘Fit In’ can cause poor choices.
Things got better in a tense and uncomfortable way for our daughter after that. I can honestly say that those girls will forever be mean and hurtful unloved people in my eyes. I’ve tried to see them as victims of their own upbringings, or lack there of, but that always melds into nasty faced unpleasant people. I don’t doubt that over half of that group of youthful bullies grew up to become mean, hurtful, insecure and unpleasant adults – Once a Bully, Always a Bully.
The thoughts I leave trailing along behind this post are that you never know which of your choices or actions will be forever embedded in another person’s life. Choose well, be kind, think of what kind of effect you have on others. Be the reason someone smiles.
Ain’t Life Grand!